No, Time magazine, err Dr. Sears, I am DEFINITELY not Mom enough. My kids sleep their own rooms, with strict bed and wake up times. I was able to breastfeed the LM until he was 7 months old, baby only until 3 months. I wear my kids until my back hurts, and then I am the first to pop open the stroller. The LM gets candy and cookies as special treats, and has been known to have a donut or two (gasp) for breakfast on the weekend. Sometimes I unfairly yell at my kids, or lose my patience. Sometimes I give in too easy, when I should stay firm. I've even been known to let a bad word slip here or there, especially when we are late... oh, yeah... we are also often running late. I am not a perfect Mother, because I am not a perfect human. No one is. Yet, it seems like there is always someone (usually with an MD after their name) trying to sell book, telling us that there is some ideal way to raise children, and anything less than said ideal will emotionally scar you children causing them to be unable to function as adults.
Which is most parent's greatest fear, second only to a grave illness.
The fear that somehow we will F&*% these kids up. That they will grow to hate us. That they will drop out of school. Turn to a life a drugs or other vice, and basically be miserable. Why? Because we somehow failed them.
Yes, that kind of fear.
While I get what Time was trying to illustrate with their article, the title itself implies that there is an "enough" when it comes to parenting, and that unless you are doing X, then you are not doing "enough" and if you are doing more than X, then you are doing to much. Trying to stir up a new "Mommy War" a few days before Mother's Day, seems like a cheap way to sell a magazine (and boy are they selling) by praying on the insecurities of Mothers (which we all HAVE) igniting a debate, that was already heated enough.
Most of us are doing all that we can. We do it in different ways... with boobs or bottles, a village of family members or by ourselves, with organic food or a box of cereal, with a partner or without. No one really knows what the "right" way is, or even if there is a"right" way. In the end, you can only hope you did enough. That should have been the title. "You are doing enough, because you are doing all you can."
I received my Mother's Day card from the Little Man today. He was asked to describe why he loves his Mom. His answer was that I do "so fun things for {him}." I can only hope that this is his response in 40 years... that being his "fun mom" was enough... I may not be perfect, but I am definitely doing the best that I can.
HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY TO YOU ALL!
I am Mom enough... and so are all of you!
I am Mom enough... and so are all of you!
2 comments :
Well said, well said. And happy mother's day to you too.
~Deirdre
A friggin' MEN!
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