Why Don't These Things Come With Instruction Manuals??

Tuesday, August 26, 2008


Yes, by things I am talking about my baby. Ok, I know there are about a zillion books out there which cover all topics ranging from breast feeding to gas, gas to sleep schedules, sleep schedules to separation anxiety; you name it, I've read it. The problem is that none of these book are about my baby. 

Here's the problem. Liam and I are plugging on fine. Amazingly, I was able to keep him alive, healthy, and generally pretty happy for an entire year. The fact that I loved every minute of it is a totally unexpected bonus as far as I'm concerned. But, like all small miracles, things can change in a blink of an eye. 

Liam turned on me. My bubbling, giggly, outgoing, silly little man, all of a sudden became possessed. He became a crabby, whiny, needy little spider monkey (imagine something hanging for dear life from around your neck 24/7, spider monkey pretty much paints the picture.) Where is my baby???? Where the eff did he go? 

Short of an exorcism (I called my local church, apparently they don't do these anymore; crazy I know!), I have spent hours crying, reading, chewing my nails....you get the gist. So I began thinking how is it possible that the day after his first birthday, his personality totally changed. So does that mean I have to brace myself every 365 days for a totally new kid? 

Finally it hit me, literally like a ton of bricks. The day after his first birthday (which by the way is exactly what those so called books tell you to do) I began giving him whole milk. This is the very moment when my devil child came to fruition.  Coincidence? I think not. After a quick call to the pedi, and a switch back to formula, surprise, surprise my loving little independent baby is back. 

I went back and you know what? Not one of those damn books mentioned crankiness as a symptom of lactose intolerance. Guess, I'll have to write my own manual. One just for my baby. Of course my book would have celebrity baby pictures, diagrams, and fashion tips........take that Dr. Spock.

1 comment :

that girl ? said...

Aahh...does that explain Small Child's demon like behaviour at the age of three and a half? Possibly not as this only manifested itself at age 2 and three quarters! Darn it - was hoping for a quick fix! I started reading this post and thought that perhaps Liam was really advanced and doing the terrible two's early!

p.s. I am your first follower!
p.p.s. Where are the new closet and shoe collection photos...I'm waiting!! x