When I Grow Up.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Recently I was out on a play date with a very good friend of mine who I used to work with in my former life. My former lawyer life. The one where I worked 60 plus hours a week. The one where I was constantly exhausted, constantly stressed out, constantly checking my blackberry waiting to hear from my terror of a boss about how she would have done everything differently. 

You get the idea, work in general sucks. The worst part, I had to wear suits and pantyhose, yes pantyhose. Clearly not hot. Now I spend my days in my casual fabulousness, drinking lattes, playing at the park, working out, hosting play dates, generally loving every minute of my life.

I thought that everyone around me knew how incredibly fulfilled I feel. How much I love being a stay at home mom. How I never want to go back to my former life. Clearly I was wrong.

So I was at said play date commenting to my friend about how much fun it was to be able to go to the park everyday with my little man. This is when my friend turned to her daughter and said, "you know how we always talk about what you want to be when you grow up?" "Yes Mommy," she innocently replied. To which my girlfriend responded, "well if you work really hard, and go to law school, then one day you too can spend you days lunching, working out, and sitting in the grass just like Yum." Punch to the gut.

It wasn't so much what she said, but rather how she said it. Insinuating that I was some kind of failure, or maybe some papered housewife. What about the fact that I worked really hard to get here, and that maybe some things are more important that my career. Like I don't know, watching my kid grow up. Wasn't the whole point of the women's movement that we wanted a choice, if we are lucky enough to have one? 

I am confident in my choice, and in the end that's all that matters. I just wish I could let it stop bothering me what other people think I should be doing with my life.

11 comments :

that girl ? said...

In true English fashion YM, I say "Arse to that"! You are so right - it is all about choices in the end!
Sometimes as I sit at home two days a week typing inventories for less than a third of the hourly rate I used to get paid, I do sigh and think how I miss the social interaction from my old career for the big insurer. But the trade off is worth it and it's all about priorities. I have more time with my girl, far less stress, more quality time at the weekend with the two most important people in my life and I feel lucky because my husband earns enough to enable me to do this! I CHOOSE IT! I have experienced both sides and I know which I prefer! Now hurry up and move your Yummy Mummy Arse over to England!

Grosi said...

go girl-you made the right decision.you will never regret it in the long run,believe me.the jobs will always be there for you to return to at a later time.yes,everybody has to make a choice!

Yummy Mummy said...

tg- you are so right! and omg could you imagine the shopping we could do in Jolly Old England? i seriously need to start planning a trip now!

Yummy Mummy said...

i have a feeling grosi is a bit biased since it is her grandson we are talking about, but i love knowing the fam is behind the decision! I know liam is.

xoxo

Anonymous said...

You are so RIGHT Ms. Mummy. Kick ass girlfriend.

Anonymous said...

Ms. Mummy:

One of your employees has erased one of my earlier posts. Can YM look into this immediately and fire those responsible? Clearly the Yummy one does not tolerate censorship. Thank you.

Sincerely,

#1 YM Fan

ps I'm sure you look especially Yummy today.

Yummy Mummy said...

No mistake here, YM posts this blog to try to entertain those out there. If you want to take is seriously and post hurtful comments, I prefer not to have to read them.

xoxo
ym

Grosi said...

its all about choices,nobody should critizise the other person.what works for YM may not work for you,mr.anonymous.

Anonymous said...

Dear YM:

Mr. Anonymous must aplogize. He has been very anti-women lately. Please allow me a minute to tell you my story. I was once married. I had the trophy bride. I too supported her and our child. She had whatever she needed, whenever she needed it. I had no snowboards, no fancy bicycles, no ironed clothes, no organic dinner on the table and piss poor Milwaukee's Best in the fridge. I would come home from work all too often to find our child crying in the corner with a mess in his pants while my wife was talking to her girlfriend on her cell phone planning their next trip to the Spa.
And what did I get in return? I'll tell Ms. Mummy. I came home after working all day last Saturday (on top of a 70 hour work week M-F) only to find that bitch in bed with our 20 y.o. babysitter. Thats right. The same 20 y.o. babysitter that came onto me time after time. She tortured me with her tank tops and shorty shorts. But I never gave in. Mr. Anonymous never broke his vows. And that is how I was treated.
Please YM. Tell me how I should feel? Help me get over this. I'm opening up and reaching out to you in this time of need. Please don't hang up on me.

Yummy Mummy said...

My advice. Hire a good divorce attorney. Take the kid and what you have left of your life. Find a nice girl and live happily ever after.

Yummy Mummy said...

oh and to save money on therapy bills you could always blog about it. maybe get a book deal.