Today it's been one year and two weeks since my miscarriage. That means today is the day we are "officially" infertile for insurance purposes. This means we can finally get this ball rolling. We met with the Dr. today and here is the bottom line. I'll keep it short because I'm sure some of you out there are more than bored with this topic (myself included.)
- This will be my last Clomid cycle. Clearly it is not working and at this point it has weakened my lining to the point that it's not that likely that we will conceive this way. Buh bye Clonmid, I can't be happier to be done with this.
- Next cycle we start injectibles and IUI. Basically they are daily injections to stimulate the follicles with artificial insemination.
- We do this for two months.
- If during one of those cycles I stimulate more than 3 eggs than we can get emergency IVF and implant 2 eggs. If it is 3 we can decide not to go forward with the insemination, and if it is 2 or lower we would move forward.
- After two months if this doesn't work we move forward with the IVF implanting one or two eggs (we haven't decided.)
- The Doc said I should feel better once I get off the Clomid.
Bottom line? They have no idea why we can get pregnant. Clomid is doing more harm than good. They can get us pregnant. We could very easily have twins.
The husband very much only wants one more baby and my doctor seems to be very cautious erring on the side of, "I'd rather have one follicle than three" so overall I pretty good about it.
So now we just wait until next month. Seems like we may have a baby (or two) on their way before Christmas. Exciting and scary!
Obviously, if any of you out there have been through this or are going through this, any advice or thoughts you may have would be greatly appreciated!
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While I can't imagine what you've been throuh with your ongoing battle to get pregnant, I can sympathize with the miscarriage part. I had a miscarriage at 10 weeks and had to have a D&E. We got pregnant again, and I had another miscarriage at 8 weeks. Finally, when we weren't trying, we conceived Quinn who is a healthy almost 1 year old now!
It sounds like you're in good hands with your doctors and the fertility specialists. Best of luck and wishes!!!
Are they going to clear your tubes first? Do a laproscopy? I remember you mentioning a possible blockage from MC. I guess it wouldn't matter if you end up doing IVF. I don't know what your insurance situation is and I am not fishing for info either. It was way worth it for us to go through the lap first because we only had coverage for the meds no procedures (IVF would have been around 13,000$ per cycle no guarantee). I am sure you will want to go forward with more then one embryo, if it comes to that it is scary though. I had one cycle cancelled because the conservative RE would not go forward with 3 follicles. I had the over stimulation of ovaries the 4th cycle the ones that the twins stuck. I had 22 follicles developing and the RE (the not conservative one who had all the pregnancy success) was willing to go forward and "capture six" See how you desperate I was! holy shit I can't even imagine triplets. Anyway my ovaries were the size of grapefruits but I survived. I know you are going to get pg soon -I don't mean to scare you but I loved reading success stories. My dh used to joke about them getting his sample mixed up with some other guy-so NOT funny. We would get his sample at home then I would haul ass running out the door (then drive to the clinic which was on the edge of the time limit for it to survive thinking I better not get pulled over it will ruin my cycle) I did check the thing they used to inseminate to make sure it said JHansen every time. My friend that I met online who went through the same thing had b/g twins also just had
another boy (monday) surprise pregnancy. Its making me think about another one in a couple of years. AM I crazy? Don't tell my DH I said that. Well keep us posted. I wish I had everything journaled from before.
Jodi- I can't thank you enough for sharing your story. We ate lucky, Mass covers IVF and everything thus fas so long as we have met certain criteria (we have as of today) so it is only a minimal co-pay. I am doing the laproscopy (sp) on tuesday and hopefully it will flush out enough and we could possibly get lucky on this last clomid cycle. I'm not getting my hopes up. I love hearing stories like yours! Gives me hope!!!!
I will definitely keep you posted! Thanks again!
YM
Good luck with your next steps!! I know how you feel about the Clomid... I finally got pregnant on our 6th and last cycle with clomid... our next step was also going to be IUI. I wish you all the best and pay you get your baby and feel better!!
In terms of insurance, why do you have to wait a year before moving forward with fertility treatments? We have been trying for 5 months and am hoping to see a specialist next month.
For most insurance companies the rule is one year. Usually you can fudge this date, unless you have had a MC, then they go 13 months from then. That's great if they will see you sooner. All I could get was Clomid until that 1 year date.
Just conceived my first after a year of troubles and two IUI cycles. Only had one little follicle and it did it's job!
Just be prepared, it's a very time consuming, exhausting procedure. Go to it day by day.
I heard the moodiness was even greater on injectables, which is why i decided to stop trying with "help." Also, I didn't like my doctor's response of, "There's nothing wrong with you, from what we can tell, but we're just going to keep going down this path anyways." Also, I decided I didn't really want kids right now. (I only wanted them when I hated my job.)
I do think it is odd that they didn't check your tubes till this week. That should have been one of the first things they checked... Because if a blockage has formed, it would have been good to know that before pumping you full of Clomid.
I have good feelings about the IUIs! I did those too, but only with Clomid, not injectables. And if you are doing it at Brigham Women's, they provide the men "special magazines" to use when they go in the mornings to give their "samples."
Clomid didn't work for me either. I did injectibles and finally ended up at a cross roads...ivf or stop. We stopped because of my blood pressure issues and IVF cost since my ins, pays for everything but. Ultimately we adopted...three total and it was perfect for us. I hope it works for you. -kriss
You're trying too hard. Take a break before you start on more drugs. Have a ton of sex, forget about it if you can. Throw out those fertility kits. Give it a few months, maybe 9 months. If nothing happens, then go for it. This is not a test. You said it yourself, the doctor says there is basically nothing wrong with you. Why are you acting like there is?
Awwww I think fate is waiting for me to get knocked up too so we can be preggers together!! Except you can have the twins :)
Sending good fertile vibes your way!
That is so great to hear! I knew there were about 12 states that covered infertitlity well (family building act or something) Fl just happenend to NOT be one of them. For sure it will happen soon. The moodiness is a given-but it will be there anyway when you get pregnant if that is how you react to hormones. I can feel the hormones running through my veins like my skin is crawling (hypersensitive that's me)the moodiness takes a back seat to the constant nausea though that first trimester. The lap is really not bad at all it is so exciting to know what is going on in there. I had stage endometriosis they lazered off they said the next four months after would be the highest to get pregnant after they removed that stuff. So I said bring on the big guns (drugs)! Sorry to your readers who don't want to hear this infertility stuff :(
The issue about waiting a year b.f insurance kicks in has mostly to do with age. If the woman is 35 or over 6 months is generally the wait time. Then insurance kicks in for fertility.
Best of luck. Relax, take a deep breath and know that everything will be alright.
First, oh my god, anonymous. Shut up. I love how people like you imply that it's a woman's fault if she can't get pregnant. "Relax!" Please.
Anyway.
We're also in Boston, so we went through the insurance mandated cycles of Clomid, injectibles with IUI, and then 3 rounds of IVF. They couldn't find "anything wrong" with me, either. Well, not until my poor response to stims made it painfully clear that I was suffering from diminished ovarian reserve (was 33 at the time I was diagnosed). My third IVF worked, and I have a kick ass 22 month old boy as a result.
My second was a spontaneous pregnancy, a total surprise. And I can tell you, it didn't happen because I was finally "relaxed" or "not trying too hard." (Relaxation for me does NOT = 8 month old baby + full time job + already planning my next IVF cycle for hoped for #2. But maybe that's just me.) It was luck, pure and simple. Most of my eggs are shot, and I got lucky on my third IVF, and then I got really lucky when we conceived my daughter.
I do think that much of what goes into making our reproductive systems work is a mystery, and that's why so much seems vague and unknowable. Could you possibly get pregnant on your own eventually? Maybe. But infertility is a medical condition, and you have a right to seek treatment for it. We are extremely lucky that we live in MA and have access to the kind of (insurance covered) care that is here. I'll be rooting for you.
"You're trying too hard."
People who say this make me furious. Anonymous, you don't say this to anyone who is trying to get pregnant. This is the last thing you say to them. It's very insensitive. That was very unkind.
To clarify, my irritation was in response to the anon who told YM to "stop trying so hard" and "throw out those fertility kits." That crap made me crazy when I was in the trenches.
Didn't mean any offense all, but I don't think medical intervention is always necessary only 6 months in when you are trying to get pregnant. If you think it is that is your business, not mine, but this is a blog afterall. For many it can take up to a year to get pregnant naturally. And I wasn't implying it was her fault either. Miscarriage is very common, but a lot don't talk about it. Many who miscarry go on to have perfectly fine pregnancies. What I was trying to say is that it seems she is blaming herself and I was saying she shouldn't. I am also a little baffled as to why the medical community is so over-zealous in my opinion. They think they have the answers to everything and they clearly don't. Just another approach is all.
Ew, infertile - gross! And what a disappointment to The Husband (love those cheesy caps!). If you suck at having babies, do you think you'll consider going back to work?
Dear yummy,
I went through infertility with my first child, and ultimately conceived by IUI. I do have a diagnosis, although I conceived naturally the second time around during a one-month "chlomid break". The most important thing, in my opinion, is to take good care of your body through the process. Get massages, try acupuncture, rest. I know this basic advice, and that you are a healthy person already. But it does take a toll on us emotionally and physically. When you are holding your next baby in your arms, your journey to get there may not make sense, but he or she surely will.
Thank you all for sharing your stories and your support. Anon is right, we could wait a year or two and it is likely that we could conceive. All I can think of is how stressful those two years would be. We are not afraid of western medicine and if we can have another baby I don't really care whether it's conceived in a petri dish or in my uterus. All I care is that it (or they) are healthy. I think that we are very fortunate to live in a state where they don't treat infertility as a mental condition but rather as a physical one. I think that it's also true that you can never really identify with the situation until you are in that situation yourself. I feel like 13 months and 6 months of drug was long enough. For the first time we see a light at the end of this tunnel and it feels good.
and anon....My husband is a very loving and supportive man who sees this as a challenge that we are BOTH facing. I hope one day you will be lucky enough to have someone like that. Yes, I do plan on going to work. To the same job that I've had for the past 2 years, mom to LM and homemaker. It works for our family, I'm not sure why it seems to bother you?
Thanks again to all of you out there!!!
xoxo
ym
Oh Anonymous!! if you dont know anything about insurance, why comment? YM is right about waiting the year, I work for a Insurance company and know more than anything what she is talking about, why must people say things they really know nothing about?
Good Luck YM stay strong, it will all be worth it in the end :)
What a bunch of presumptuous readers you have. How the hell do you know what I know about insurance or about what my situation is? Get off your high horses ladies. And try reading peoples comments before you shoot off your mouths. I don't think you understand the english language very well. I won't be reading, or commenting EVER again, thanks.
What is WRONG with people? I can't believe the abusive things people are willing to say. YM: keep your head up high. Your positivity is infectious and I can't imagine the world would not want to give you whatever you want. Thanks for your courage in blogging about your struggles and here's to one (or two) more babies in 2010.
Goodness me (Gosh, how British I sound when indignant!). A lot of back and forthing on what is essentially YM's business and her feelings. Yes I know she blogs about it (lots of people blog about stuff but it doesn't give others the right to judge or advise), nonetheless, it's her innermost feelings, so perhaps a little respect on what is a sensitive subject? Its also a very personal one, one that I have not experienced so I will offer nothing more than good feelings for whatever path you choose YM and hope that you achieve your goal of another baby! And don't be afraid to write about your journey... if people don't like it then they shouldn't read it.
And now I need to climb off my high horse and get to bed as SC will be up in less than 7 hours from now! Big love to you, the hubs and LM xx
My heart goes out to you -- we are leaving parallel lives -- I have a 2 year old son, had a miscarriage in June and just started clomid this month. I am cheering for you because I am hoping your success will be contagious. Ignore the nasty bloggers, they don't understand. It sucks and I like you try to positive and not get completely stressed every month. My only advantage (I never saw it as an advantage) is I am 39 so I will only have 3 cycles of clomid.
Good luck, my fingers are crossed for you.
Wishing you lots of luck with this next step in your journey. I really really hope you don't have to wait much longer.
I wrote a comment a few days ago, but it looks like it didn't go through.
I just wanted to wish you the best of luck with your upcoming injectable/IUI cycle. You must be excited to be moving on from Clomid. Injectables/IUI blessed me with my 4 year old twins, and now I'm starting my first IVF cycle in hopes of conceiving just 1 more child (we're doing an elective single embryo transfer- one set of twins is enough for us!) Anyway, my thoughts are with you, and wishing you success! (By the way, I'm from MA too- the south shore, and I thank my lucky stars every day that we have such great health insurance coverage for fertility treatments in our state!) Best of luck!
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