"What Happened?" Is The New "Why?"

Two year olds are notorious for getting stuck on certain phrases, the most common one is Why? They are called conversation extenders and supposedly they use them to keep the conversation going so they can learn how to expand their language. While they are a great tool for the little ones, they also can be super, SUPER annoying to the big ones who are on the other side of the extender. I have been very patiently (aka dreading) the day that the whys would begin in our household, and I'm thinking that at this point we may have dodged that bullet. What bullet we didn't dodge is the one that hit us straight in the heart. The one called "What Happened." 

Here is a little snippet from my day, and what every day has been like for the past few weeks.

LM: What Happened?

Me: I turned on the car.

LM. Oh yea.

(one second later)

LM: What Happened?

Me: I pushed the garage opener.

LM. Oh yea.

(one second later)

LM: What Happened?

Me: I turned on the radio.

LM. Oh yea.

(one second later)

LM: What Happened?

Me: I scratched my ear.

LM. Oh yea.

(one second later)

LM: What Happened?

Me: Nothing, nothing happened.

LM. Oh yea.

(one second later)

LM: What Happened?

Me: I stopped at the stop sign.

LM. Oh yea.

(one second later)

..... you get the point. 

While this is a great sign of his little developing mind (yay for him) it is also really, really, really, really, really exhausting to narrate the ENTIRE day. By five o' clock the following is often running through my head on repeat, 

"I so need a glass of wine I think I might be losing my mind I really love this kid but if he asks me one more question without caring what the answer is I might have to claw my eyes out with a hammer oh my god when is Daddy going to be home to answer one of these questions, did I really sign up for this, why do I want another two year old...."

Usually this thought is broken with,

"Mama what happened?"

I really wish I could answer back,

 "Nothing honey, momma's just losing her mind, thats all."

Of course I would *never* say that.

Okay its not quite that bad, but it definitely leaves me with the desire to have absolutely no conversation once the little guy is in bed. The other night I had to sit my big guy down (aka my husband) and say, 

"Look babe, you know I love you right? So here's the deal, I answer about one million and one questions a day so I at night I need you to only ask be about things you absolutely must have the answer to. Actually if you could not ask me any questions at all that would be really great. Talk all you want just please of you have any mercy in your soul DO NOT ASK ME A QUESTION TONIGHT. Okay? Now please pour me a double glass of wine."

His response?

What Happened?

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that they are trying to kill me.