City Mouse, Country Mouse.

While my Little Man is very much a city mouse all year round, last week we learned that just under the surface, a little country boy was aching to get free. Here are some pictures from our adventures at Grandma's house.

        

Thankful.

Sorry for the delay in posting my friends. This weekend my hubby battled the stomach flu (so much for my morning sickness) and after a day of packing, yesterday we traveled down to Maryland for our annual Thanksgiving vacation. Everything went smoothly with our trip, and I must admit I am not looking forward to the prospect of traveling with an  under 3 year old again. Maybe this time we will just stay home for a while (yeah, I believe that just as much as you do.)

Well, it is Thanksgiving, and I am happy to report I have something to be very thankful for... Monday we saw a heartbeat! A real, true, strong, butterfly like heartbeat. I am finally convinced that there really is a baby in there! Also, which according to my husband is the real news, is that there was only ONE heartbeat. There had been some early speculation by my Dr. that our single embryo might have split into identical twins, but alas there is just one strong little fighter, which is perfectly a OK with us. I was given a due date of July 17th, and so far everything looks perfectly normal. I can't even begin to tell you what a relief that was.

So this year, as much as any other, I am just so thankful for my family. I have two amazing boys at home, and I can't believe that soon there will be one more of us. I feel so blessed that I am able to have another chance to be a momma, and I just know my little man is going to love being big brother. (He already asked if he could be the one to pick the TV shows in the morning, coming from one older sibling to another, I assured him that the big one usually gets their say... for at least a while.)

I also am a little thankful that I get to eat whatever I want this holiday season. When I requested that a second pecan pie be made this year around, I'm not sure anyone took me seriously. Let me tell you, a pregnant girl NEVER jokes about pie!

I'll leave you with this picture of my loves. I snapped them Monday after my hubby picked up the little man from school so I could sneak in a manicure (I was just as surprised as you are) and I just couldn't resist spying on them from a salon. There is something about my husband carrying a toy bunny that just does it for me... le swoon.

I hope you all have a wonderful and peaceful Thanksgiving filled with lots and lots of loved ones! I will be back next week as usual, but until then... bring on the pie!

Currently Loving.

I'm not sure if it's the hormones that have led to my cheery mood, or if it's the fact that my favorite time of year is almost upon us (Yay Christmas) but there are just so many things that I am loving right now. Here are are just a few of the things that are currently putting a smile on my face...

Source

Right now I am loving the fact that I no longer have to hate pregnant women just because they are pregnant. (Friends of course have been excluded from this.) Take Rachel Zoe for example. Had she announced her pregnancy a few months ago I would have said something to the effect of, "Seriously? How is that even possible? The woman weighs as much as my toddler and has so much Botox coursing through her veins that she is practically embalmed." Well, now that I too am with child, I only think these things (I mean we all remember this picture, right?) and now say, "How great for her and Rodge, not only is this going to make her show even more bananas, but  I can totally copy steal her pregnancy style." How could you not love that?

Source

Today is the day that the very last (sad face) Oprah's favorite things will air. I don't know why I am so nostalgic about this show, I haven't watched it for the past few years, yet now I find myself taping (and actually watching) every episode. Favorite things is absolutely the best show of the year, and lucky for me today the little man is home from school. Throw in a perfectly timed nap and a new carton of peppermint hot chocolate, and, well, let's just say that it looks like Christmas is coming early in my house today.

Source

Right now I am loving that Princess Diana is back in the headlines, even if it's just because of her amazing engagement ring. As far as I am concerned there is almost nothing better than a royal wedding, and this is one that I am definitely looking forward too. Now if Kate would just agree to wear Diana's wedding dress... oh a girl can dream.

Source

Speaking of weddings, I'm not necessarily loving this, but I must admit I do get a little happy when I hear about couples breaking up who spent a ridiculous amount of money on their wedding. Remember this 1,000,000.00$ wedding that took place not even 3 years ago? I mean, come on! You can't make it last more than three years after throwing away that kind of cash? That's 333,000.00 dollars a year, one of which the dude spent texting another woman. I am pretty anti expensive weddings from the get go (mine was under 8,000) but I figure you should at least make sure you are in it for the long haul before throwing away that kind of dough! I don't think that Desperate Housewives is paying that well (is that show even still on?)

Source

Moving on, although I think that Anderson Cooper was CLEARLY robbed, I must say I am pretty happy with this year's Sexiest Man Alive. After The Proposal I may or may not have added this man to my top 5, and seeing him all over the news has definitely brightened my week. 

I have to thank my bestie M for this one. To combat morning sickness (which I have been getting a little more each day) she turned me on to these little pressure bands you can get at the drugstore. They seem to be working (although I'm not quite sure if they are actually working, or if it is because I think they are working) and either way I'm very happy with my 10 dollar purchase!

Source

I am also currently loving this whole "feud" between Jessica Simpson and Vanessa Manillo. I can not believe Jess not only bought her own ring, but couldn't even let her ex have a week of engagement bliss before trying to rain on his happiness parade. I feel like you can just smell the desperation, and yet I am loving it! I would like to, right now, pitch the greatest reality show, ever invented. Vanessa and Jess, dueling weddings, pregnancies, baby showers...etc. The show could go on for years, and the viewers could vote on who is the best each week. Hey, I'd absolutely watch!

Source

Most of all this week I am LOVING the fact that my kid has been deemed "normal" by the experts. We had our OT evaluation this morning, and the diagnosis is that he is a happy and healthy "normal" three-year-old. They said he is stubborn, smart, active, and has very advanced motor skills, all things we already knew. I thought I would be annoyed that we even had to go through what turned out to be nonsense, but in the end I realize that you can never underestimate how awesome it is to have a person, who knows what they are talking about, tell you that there is absolutely nothing wrong with your kid. That was definitely worth the 25 dollar copay and hour of playtime!

Lastly, I am currently loving you readers! Now only are you loyal, supportive, and generally fabulous, but you often write in with some killer ideas for the blog. A few of you have asked for a holiday gift guide, mom...dad.. kids... family... etc., and to tell you the truth I have been dying to do one, so consider that my new Thanksgiving project!

Gone Shopping.

Source

I was about to write a post today when it hit me... NEXT WEEK IS THANKSGIVING!!!!

How the hell did that happen?

In my whole baby haze/glory I seem to have lost a month. Um, S%#*!

Normally this would not be problem except for the fact that next week we leave for a week, come back for 5 days, leave for NYC for the weekend, come back for two days and then leave for Costa Rica for two weeks, getting back two days before Christmas. (Whew.)

Ask me what I have gotten as far as Christmas pressies?

Yeah, you guessed it... absolutely NOTHING! Nada, zilch, zero!

Looks like I have a serious date with Amazon starting NOW!!!!!!!!

Oh, Gwyneth.

Oh, Gwyneth...

A year ago I was thinking you were over. Your newsletter was 1/2 preachy, and 1/4 boring, and 1/4 elitist. Your clothes were still fabulous, and sure you were looking gorgeous, but you didn't seem to be interested in anything else career wise. I have to admit I had written you off.

But now look at you.

Here I am counting the hours before your Glee premiere, which I just know is going to be fanfreakingtastic. (Just in case you were wondering, there are 5 hours, 9 minutes, and 51 seconds left.) I mean, a cover of Umbrella? Yeah, It's going to be awesome.

Source

While always a style icon, lately you have been sporting these ridiculously fierce looks that have truly left me oohing and aahhing. The body, the hair, the impeccable styling. I die.

Source

Source

Source

And of course, there is this song, seriously the balls it must have taken to get up and sing, a country song no less, in front of all those people. Well, consider me impressed.

Source

To top it off, I am still obsessed with this Summer's spread in Vogue. What can I say, you had me at buzz lightyear. One can only wish to look this fabulous while lazying around, preparing dinner. Oops, I must have left my gown at the cleaners...

Source

Source

Source

Let us not forget that you are still married to to the man of my dreams, and seem to be a pretty awesome mom to those two cutie pie kids. Le Swoon.

Source

Yes Gwyn, this is me apologizing. I'm sorry I ever doubted you. You may just be the yummiest mummy of them all.

Forever your fan,

Me.

P.S. I still think you can do A LOT better with your newsletter, but given your current state of fabulosity, I might just have to re-subscribe.

The Name Game.

Okay, so I promise that this will be the last post (for at least a while) relating to "all things baby number two." Indulge me for one more, would you?

I know the whole baby name thing is something that most people like to keep close to their vest. Most people usually only tell their close friends or family, and some even wait until the birth for the big announcement. As you may have guessed, I am not one of those people. There are a few reasons why I tell anyone and everyone what we are naming are offspring only a few short days after that test turns pink...

1. By telling everyone that we are 100% naming our kid/kids the following, you can avoid that whole awkward, "I hate that name," or "I once knew a girl who was covered in X and that was her name," or " I had and ex boyfriend/girlfriend named X and... blah, blah, blah."
2. If anyone else in the universe names their child the same after the big announcement you can say, with certainty, that they stole it from you. 
3. It allows you to call growing bump anything other than "the growing bump."

That's my reasoning... 

So, without further ado, somewhere around July 16th, when this little bean decides to enter the world, he/ she will be called the following:*

Boy:

Grayson "Gray" Robert Anderson
or Grayson "Gray" Werner Anderson, (if my husband gets his way which we all know he won't, I am the ONE carrying the child)

Girl:

Parker Holly Anderson

Both first names are random, and the second are family names. The Little Man took up both of our grandfather's names, William "Liam" Michael, so given that we are covered in that department we got to have a little fun with this one.

And if it's twins.....well...... don't even joke about that... that is SO not funny!

*Yes, I'm sure everyone has an opinion... but given number (1) how can you say anything negative, right? And if you love it and use it, remember you stole it from me, number (2) :) You see I may just be an evil genius after all. 

Stylish Bumps.

Since I am going to try my hardest to envision myself with a big 40 week belly, is it wrong that I would like to picture my bump looking as stylish as any of these? These women make mother hood look damn GOOD!

P.S. We just go my updated numbers back and rather than doubling they actually tripled to over 1000. The Dr. said this is a great sign and now all we have to do is sit tight and wait until the 22nd for our 6 week appointment. Getting that call was a HUGE relief and just what I needed before, what will now be, a very relaxing weekend. Of course, I wish you all the same!

P.P.S. We had our parent/teacher conference today (another thing I was DREADING) and we only received rave reviews about our little man. They still think an OT eval isn't a bad idea, but they have seen an amazing increase in his attentiveness and listening, and they have no real concerns about his development. Go figure?

I guess some times it really does rain good news... a girl could get used to this!

Anxious.

First off I can't thank ALL of you enough for your kinds words, prayers, and congratulations!!!! I can't even begin to explain to you what that outpouring of love has meant to us, and the fact that so many of you have been through this lengthy journey with me from the beginning makes me feel truly blessed. Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!

I didn't post yesterday because I really wasn't sure what I was feeling. Immediately upon hearing the news, Tuesday, I felt a wave of relief. Pure and utter relief. Relief that I would never ever have to think about trying to conceive, ovulation, IVF, pregnancy tests, waiting and wishing, all of it. Honestly, the only thing I can compare it to was the day I got my bar results, that feeling of being so done with something that you worked so hard for, and knowing that you would never EVER have to think about it again.

I began to notice yesterday that the feeling of relief was quickly being replaced by one of anxiety. Within minutes of sharing my news I received more than a few emails and texts from friends, who themselves were expecting, and who were waiting to share the wonderful news with me until I had some of my own to pass on. (Which by the way is amazingly considerate and something I never would have asked for, but greatly appreciate.) While this news made me so unbelievably excited, it also reminded me that there is no guarantee that this baby is going to make it through the long haul. All I can think about was what happened last time, when we went to hear the heartbeat at 10 weeks and there was nothing there. What if that happens again, and what if, just like last time, I'm the only one who doesn't have a baby in the end? I feel like we have come so far, but in reality we are only at the beginning. What if we have to start all over? These questions have driven me crazy the past 48 hours. I have been analyzing every twitch, pain, wondering if the fact that I am not sick (yes, I realize this doesn't usually happen yet) means that something is wrong. My stomach is so large from the progesterone, and I can't help but keep wondering if there really is a baby in there. Something which I ask my husband about 100 times a day (sorry babe.)

I realize that all of this is out of my control, but I am finding it really hard to turn off all of the noise in my head. I keep reminding myself that we had an almost perfect embryo put in, and that because it happened last time is no indication that it will happen again. I keep thinking of all the people I know who have had perfect and healthy pregnancies, and the fact that I have actually had a perfect and healthy pregnancy, and I know that there is no reason why anything will go wrong. That is what I keep telling myself, now I realize I just have to start believing it.

As anxious as I feel, I am comforted by the fact that this feeling will only last for the next few days/weeks. Tomorrow I am getting my blood drawn again and if the numbers (which were pretty high in the beginning) have doubled we have a good sign. I will do the same again on Monday, and about a week from then we should be able to schedule an ultrasound just to make sure that that little heart is beating as it should. I am going to try to go back to yoga this weekend, or swim, or do something to try to calm my mind.

I'm going to try to keep picturing myself at 40 weeks, and I know with just a little bit of luck we will get there...

(Photo Credit: From Here.)

Priceless.

27 Months spent trying for baby number 2.


1 Miscarriage. 


6 months of Clomid.


2 rounds of IVF. 


142 negative pregnancy tests.


Finally finding out that I am knocked up....... 

Priceless.

That's right people..... I AM PREGNANT! And not just a little pregnant. Pregnant with high numbers, a solid embryo, 5 weeks Sunday pregnant. Yeah, that kind of pregnant.

I realize that we are still only at the beginning, and that a million and one things can still go wrong, but for today I am going to bask in the pregnancy glow, tear into this giant rice krispy treat in front of me, and celebrate the fact that contrary to popular belief, my womb is not as dry as the Sahara Desert.


WOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!

So Much For That Glow.

As you all know tomorrow is the big day, and yes, as expected, I am very, very, very anxious.

I am feeling like we may get some good news, but I refuse to get me hopes up as we have been down this road more than a few times, and every time that I was "convinced" that I was pregnant, I got a big fat negative.

Lets just say I'm cautiously optimistic.

If I needed any sort of sign that I may be with child, the following would be a great indication. Either that or I am in some serious need of a new face cream.

So, last night I was in the grocery store and I ran into a Mom of one of the local kids. She knew we had been trying to have a baby, but not all of the gory details regarding our efforts. I had just been swimming with the little man, and granted I did not look my finest, but after a few minutes of catching up she cautiously asked, "is there any news on the baby front?" "Nothing certain, but we just did another round of IVF I replied. "Well, she said... the minute I saw you I knew, you do not look like her usual self. I thought she looks very tired, and kind of gray so she must be pregnant."

Thanks I guess? I actually took this as a good omen, rather than a comment on how awful I looked, but as I was leaving all I could think was.... so much for that glow.

I thought nothing of it until today, when I ran into my neighbor in the hallway. "Oh my goodness," she said when she saw me. "I'm guessing you have good news?" "No, not yet, I replied." "Um, I think you definitely are knocked up... you just look so tired!"

Okay, okay... if I'm not pregnant I'm making that Botox appointment stat!

Well, tomorrow we will see, and I'll let you all know as soon as we tell our families... which if you know me, means within hours after! Thank you again for all of you well wishes, and kind thoughts, you have been a great support system over the last few years and I know I couldn't have made it through all of this without you!

So I Had This Idea....

2 week wait = FAIL.

So I swore up and down that under no circumstances was I to take any at home pregnancy tests before getting my real, doctor sanctioned,  test on Tuesday.

Um, yeah... so that lasted exactly 8 days.

See you are not supposed to take HPT (home pregnancy tests) because you can get a false positive from the "trigger" shot that is given the day before your retrieval. Well, last time I didn't listen (because I am a rebel) and I got all negatives. This time around I thought I could trick the system and take the test early enough that I would get a negative (confirming that the trigger was out of my system) so then if I took a test over the weekend and it came back positive, then I would know it was a true positive.

Evil genius right?

Wrong!

The damn thing popped up with a positive, which normally would be AWESOME, except we have no way of knowing if it is from the trigger or from a baby. Crap. I guess now I'll just have to be a good girl and wait until Tuesday. Humph.

Even though it means absolutely nothing, can I tell you how amazing it was to look at an actual positive pregnancy test after 26 months of negatives? I think that if this round doesn't work out for us I am going to have my pregnant bestie pee on a stick each month for me just so I can see those magical words again.

Oh, it's going to be a long 4 days...

Stuff That Serves No Purpose.

I've mentioned here before that my husband and I love nothing more than a good brawl over home furnishings, and after reading this article I was happy to see that we weren't alone. Luckily for us, no therapy was needed, (whew) we are now in the final stages of the ordering process, and soon I am hoping our home will look just like that, a home. 

The one point of contention that still remains is what I like to refer to as the "chach," you know, the accessories. While I have no problem spending good money on a quality piece of furniture, the last thing that I want to do is waste it on 1) anything my little man can break, 2) anything that only goes with "this" home, and 3) anything that I could get tired of in the next two years. This my husband agrees on. What he doesn't ahem didn't agree on was why we needed it at all.  Basically we were are at a standstill. While I may refer to it as "necessity," he loving refers to it as "S*%$ that serves no purpose." Sticks, vases, decorative bowls, shells... you name it, he vetoes/ed it. 

Well, this week I decided to take advantage of the fact that my MIL was here. She has an awesome eye for decorating, and amazingly whatever she usually approves of, her adoring son magically does as well (as any good boy should.) We hit up West Elm and I was amazed at all the "stuff that serves no purpose" that I was able to get for some incredibly reasonable prices. Once all the furniture arrives I can post the true after pictures but for now here is my bounty of "chach" that I got on a accessory friendly budget, that even the husband couldn't complain about. 

(Between you and me I think he actually likes all of it, shhhhhhhh.)

I had never been in a West Elm before, and I was happily surprised with the quality of their goods (Ikea this is not.) I definitely got some great ideas for our home, and even some for the hopefully soon to be nursery.

I believe this now makes the tally Yummy Mummy 6, Hubs 2... but really who's keeping score ;).

Race To Nowhere.

Lately, I have talked a bit about some of the issues that my Little Man and I have been having in school, and some of the best feedback that has come from all of you is to remember that my kid is only 3! (that and to take a deep breath.) As a parent I want the best education for my child, but I am often reminded, by myself and those around me, that our children are just that, children, and it is important that we as parents begin to stand up and advocate for what is best for them, which I am beginning to learn is not what is not necessarily always in line with system is asking from them.To that end, I am so excited to share the following with you.

The Kingsley Montessori School, which has an ongoing speaker series open to the public, on November 10th,* is hosting a special screening of the critically acclaimed new film entitled Race to Nowhere, a documentary about the high-pressure culture that has invaded America’s school system and today’s students - creating unhealthy, disengaged, unprepared, and stressed-out youth.  I, myself, have been so eager to see this film since seeing the rave reviews in the press, and happily will be attending as a guest my girlfriend.

Race to Nowhere features the heartbreaking stories of young people who have been pushed to the brink and educators who are burned out and worried that students are not developing the skills they need. It shows what is actually happening to kids as a result of current policies and practices obsessed with testing, performance, and competition rather than meaningful teaching and learning.

The film’s producer and co-director Vicki Abeles notes, “As a mother, I experienced the stress firsthand and realized that no one was talking about it.  I saw kids who were anxious, depressed, physically ill, checking out, abusing drugs and, worst case, attempting suicide.  I felt compelled to speak out about this crisis by making a film and giving voice to the students, teachers, and parents.  I wanted to expose a deeper truth about our education system.  We are graduating a generation of robo-students, unable to think and work independently, creatively and collaboratively.”


The trailer (which brought tears to my eyes) can be seen here:

 

Heartbreaking right? I hope you are able to see this movie, either when it comes to a town near you, or when it is released on video. Already I feeling empowered to be more of a "voice" for my child, and I am eager to learn from the kids and parents featured in this documentary. Our kids aren't going to get a second chance to have a childhood, and I hope that we are able to make the most of the only one they have....

For more information please visit www.racetonowhere.com.

*This event is sold out. To get information about future events please visit www.kingsley.org

Kingsley Montessori School, located in the heart of Boston, serves students between the ages of two and Grade Six. Kingsley Montessori’s approach to teaching and learning is focused on each child’s individual potential, talents, and level of development – helping children learn in the best way for them.  For more information about Kingsley and their Community Speaker Series program, visit www.kingsley.org.