Conversations With My 3 Year Old.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Ever wonder what it is like to converse with a 3 year old?

No, I didn't think so, but since I spend every minute of my day talking to one, I'm going to tell you anyway. Usually, our conversations are equal parts adorable and frustrating, but now that the little man is in his "curious stage" they are mostly just annoying. I know this does not qualify me for mother of the year, but I'm just wondering why it is that we push so hard for these little guys to actually talk? Wouldn't silence (for even one minute) just be so damn nice?

All kidding aside, sometimes I seriously think I must be losing my mind. Need an example? Here is a snippet of this morning's conversation.

LM: Mommy, where this ouchie come from? (said while pointing to a 4 day old scab on his knee.)
Me: I'm not sure, maybe the park.
LM: No!
Me: Okay, maybe the gym.
LM: No, it came from (inaudible)
Me: What did you say?
LM: (clearly frustrated) Its come from (inaudible)
Me: Dude where?
LM: It came from a yellypish!
Me: A jellyfish?
LM: Yeah.
Me: Um, okay. (I can assure you it did not come from a jellyfish)

3 seconds later

LM: Where do yellypish come from?
Me: The ocean.
LM: Where does the ocean come from? (clearly concerned)
Me: Um..... the ocean comes from the earth.
LM: Whhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
Me: I don't know it just does.
LM: WHHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!
Me: The ocean is part of the earth, it just is.
LM: NO! It comes from airplanes.
Me: Yeah, whatever. (deep breath)

3 seconds later

LM: Where does airplanes come from.
Me: The sky.
LM: Where the people on airplanes come from.
Me: They come from their houses.
LM: Whhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy:?
Me: Because they need to go somewhere.
LM: Wwwwwwwwwhhhhhhhhhhhyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
Me: Because people need to go somewhere sometimes so they go on the airplane, just like you do when we visit grandpa.
LM: Oh.

3 seconds later.

LM: Mommy, where this ouchie come from? (said while pointing to a 4 day old scab on his knee.)
Me: I think it came from a jelly fish, right bud?
LM: No!!!! It come from the park.
Me: Okay.... that's what I thought.

1 second later.

LM: Momma, where the park come from?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I tell you, this kid is lucky he's so damn cute. No really, how do you debate reasoning like that? I'm pretty sure the answer is you don't. Any of you Moms (or Dads) out there want to tell me this is just a phase.

It's okay to lie.

Really.

9 comments :

Chicago Cuisine Critique said...

This is hilarious! Thanks for sharing!

Grams said...

Trust me on this, it is just a phase. Before you know it he'll be a teenager and will roll his eyes and call you "mother" in a sarcastic tone. Enjoy these meaningless conversations while they last. And, remember, this too shall pass.

MainLineMommy said...

That is so funny. Your son is so cute. I totally know what you are going through though. And if he's anything like my daughter those 4 day old scabs will soon become new every-single-time he sees them! And need band-aids for every-single-scab (oh and every bruise and every scar...) I swear she leaves the house wearing more band-aids then she does clothes!

nmaha said...

ROFL.....it's better to join 'em coz u just can't beat 'em.

My questions started at 1.6 years and 8 months down the line the logic is getting stronger.

I love the dark quiet night.

minervabird said...

It is Ok to lie. When he asks you where the wind comes from, tell him it is because the trees are sneezing. The LM is a cutie!

FortyNotOut said...

Oh god this made me laugh! Yes (she says lying through her teeth), it does get better and of course they dont start asking questions about religion and where babies come from... ahem... ;) xxx

Jodi said...

Ha ha yeah he is talking way more then mine. I told sami last night "Could you just quit asking me for things!" That is after a total of one hour at home with them. Yes you SAHM's win the patience prize. My dh gets frustrated in about 60 seconds.

Polly said...

Its just a phase!!!

Lisa said...

Okay I'm here catching up on some Yummy Mummyness, and this is the funniest post ever! Oh the twos, exploring their world and driving their mama to drink. Your LM is too cute!