I'll Take Two Please.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The first picture of SJP and her new baby twins was released today and I have two things to say.
  1. This photo melts my heart and completely gives me hope.
  2. Where can I get mine?

I remember hearing a while back, from a friend who heard from a friend, that so and so spotted SJP at a fertility clinic in Manhattan. While I never really thought about it, I also wasn't that surprised. Her son was about 4 or 5 and given her age and the fact that she hadn't yet had another baby and would openly talk about wanting one, it completely made sense. I think I had just had the little man, or was possibly pregnant at the time and infertility was the farthest thing from my mind. Yeah, well times sure have changed, and given my current situation and my own trips to the fertility center I am so thrilled to see that even if I never get pregnant myself (let's hope that's not the case) I could still have two wonderful little babies just like Miss Carrie Bradshaw (yes, I know she isn't really Carrie Bradshaw, but in my mind she will always be.)  

It's funny, in all this time I have never even considered nor even thought of surrogacy as an option. I know we are a long, long way from this type of decision but up until now I have somehow convinced myself that if I can't get pregnant, than that's it, no babies for us. I think this is what has had me so consumed and down for the past few months.  Of course I know adoption is always an option, and we have thought seriously about it for baby number three, but I don't know why, perhaps because I don't have a natural sibling, I just really want the LM to have a 100 percent flesh and blood mate. I know none of that matters, as my half sister and I are closer than she and her full sisters, but still I just really want just one more. To be honest after seeing this picture, I want two. If I were to get pregnant again, and for some reason not be able to carry that baby to full term, I would absolutely consider surrogacy. Seriously, just look at those perfect babies. Who knows, perhaps I should give another look at adoption as well, if it were to ever come to that. The point is I just need to keep reminding myself that we are lucky enough to have options. Maybe some of you could remind me of that too, just if I seem to be heading off the deep end?

Another of my irrational concerns has been a "timeline" that I seem to have in my head. I get panicked when I think that the LM is going to be almost 3 if/when I were to have another baby. And that would be only if I were to get knocked up in the next three months. I keep thinking that they won't be "close" if I don't have them less than two years apart. I have no idea why I am so concerned about this. My sister and I are 10 years apart and I don't think two siblings have ever been closer than we are. Yet still, I find myself adding up months trying to figure out if they will be in High School, or College together. Crazy right? I look at this picture and I think, "what am I so damn worried about?" That little boy really had the best of both worlds. He got to be the only one for about 6 years and now he has two amazing little sisters that he can be a great big brother to. Even more, he likely understood what was happening versus a 2 year old and will probably be better able to adapt to having two new babies in the house. Seems like a win, win all around. Again, what the hell have I been thinking? 

While all of this may seem completely obvious to most of you out there, those of you who are struggling with infertility can likely relate. It really does make you go a little out of your mind. Throw in some fertility hormones and you have the perfect storm for a little bit of crazy. Seeing this happy family, celebrities or not, really makes me see things much clearer. From now on when I am about to have one of my "no baby meltdowns" as I call them, I am going to look at this picture and remind myself to CHILL OUT. I realize that this is what everyone has been saying all along, but like most important lessons you sometimes just have to figure them out on your own. Note to self. Relax. 

Congrats to the Broderick/ Parker family. As was said on my favorite Sex and the City episode, "Your girl is lovely, Hubbell." (as quoted from The Way We Were)  In this case, both your girls are lovely. 


11 comments :

Jill said...

Hi there - just wanted to pass along a blog that I thought might interest you... http://www.elementsofstyleblog.com/

you probably know about it already (i'm usually late to the game), but just in case, i thought i'd send it your way. It's all things fashion/home design/etc. but generally on a budget.

i really enjoy your blog, and the escapades of your lm...very similiar to my 2y.o son!

Erin said...

You know, I never considered surrogacy, either. I guess I thought if we can't make a baby ourselves we'd just go to the hospital and steal one - I mean, begin the adoption process ;-)

Robin M Anderson said...

Thanks for the tip! I have heard about that blog, but i always forget to check it out! i just went over and it's great. I am a massive design-a-phobe (new word) so this is totally right up my alley!

Thanks for reading and thanks for commenting! Glad I am not the only one out there with a wild little guy :)! Boys really are great aren't they?

Thanks again.

xoxo
ym

Robin M Anderson said...

Erin,

Same egg, same sperm, different stretch marks? Not a bad idea huh? I know, I know....nothing is that simple, but it sure is food for thought.

ps...I'll watch the door while you run out the back, just make sure you grab two ;)

ym

Jodi said...

You will want LM help with your twins-you will need it; so another good part of him being a little older. Injectable hormones really work much better then clomid but make you a raging B but i bet you won't have to go any farther in treatments then that. You had me laughing with your eff this and eff that on twitter I thought, "Yep that is the clomid talking!" I am glad i am not the only mom infuratiated by naptime noises-

Anonymous said...

As another women struggling with the same challenges as you (son is almost 2 just miscarried my 2nd pregnancy) I know your frustration and sense of urgency. I am also feeling like it is time for my body to get back to "normal" begin clomid again so I can have baby #2 sooner than later (I am also almost 39 so the age factor is also a bummer!). You are not alone, I am hoping you have success this month!

Mari said...

Just started reading you blog and I am really enjoying it. I had trouble getting pregnant with my first and trouble staying pregnant with my second. I now have two healthly, sweet but crazy boys - 3 years apart. People would always tell me to relax that it would happen when the time was right. I hated hearing it but in the end I think it worked with my first. I got pregnant while waiting to start IVF. I send you positive thoughts!

Kriss said...

I love the picture of SJP and the twins! I have three adopted children from CPS after a very LONG battle with IF. I hope that you get your hearts desire and don't have have to have to much intervention. -kriss

Robin M Anderson said...

I can't thank you all enough for your support and for sharing your stories. Know that I am not alone in this, and knowing that there are happy endings out there really makes me feel like a new, saner, person.

You have to be here, to truly understand how it feels and I thank you all for taking the time to comment.

Baby dust to all of you!

xoxo

ym

jaimie arnold baird said...

robs- i am so proud of you for your new outlook on getting prego. you will have babies very soon and lm will be the best big bro. easier said than done to not worry but you're on the right track- keep it up...one day soon you'll be begging me to come get lm so you can have a break because you'll have two babies hanging from your bubbies! love ya! jaim

lunarossa said...

Same here, Robin, my son is almost 6 years old than my daughter and everything is fab between them. Yes, they fight as all do, but it was better for me not have two small ones at the same time. Beautiful photo by the way. they are so cute!!! Ciao. A.